12 June 2009

hidden in christ

so basically our household has embarked on saying a novena, for our future spouses no less and it's been 11 days... i know 11 is more than 9 but we skipped day in between and hence started over. and what i find striking is that when we started it i was doing because i know i am to pray for my future spouse and all, though not necessarily wanting one at the moment... but as the week has progressed i've begun to wish for the vocation marriage more... mmm

and then i received this from a friends email... and the first line was what i found fascinating. so i plan on hiding myself in Christ and devout catholic man i want will find me!

'A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ
That a man should have to seek Him first to find her.'

When I say.... 'I am a Christian' I'm not shouting 'I'm clean living,'
I'm whispering 'I was lost, Now I'm found and forgiven.'

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide..

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say.. 'I am a Christian' I'm not bragging of success
I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible, but God believes I am worth it.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I still feel the sting of pain...
I have my share of heartaches, so I call upon His name.

When I say... 'I am a Christian' I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner Who received God's good grace, somehow!

Pretty is as Pretty does... But beautiful is just plain beautiful!

9 June 2009

eucharist, flannery o'connor

i was reading a blog about Father Jefferey Steel who is leaving the Anglican church to become catholic, Deo Gratias... and i came across these two excerpts that are so profound to me an here they are:

My children, we know when a soul has worthily received the Sacrament of the Eucharist, it is so drowned in love, so penetrated and changed, that it is no longer to be recognised in its words or its actions. . . . It is humble, it is gentle, it is mortified, charitable, and modest; it is at peace with everyone. It is a soul capable of the greatest sacrifices; in short, you would not know it again.

-St John Vianney

the other is from Flannery O'Connor whom i have suddenly discovered and now is gong onto my amazon wish list, if only some benefactor out there would reduce my list even by one... he he he LOL, from reading it i thoug she was male... just goes to show ha! totally invigorating and affirming!!

"I was once, five or six years ago, taken by some friends to have dinner with Mary McCarthy and her husband, Mr. Broadwater... She departed the Church at the age of 15 and is a Big Intellectual. We went at eight and at one, I hadn't opened my mouth once, there being nothing for me in such company to say...Having me there was like having a dog present who had been trained to say a few words but overcome with inadequacy had forgotten them. Well, toward morning the conversation turned on the Eucharist, which I, being the Catholic, was obviously supposed to defend. Mrs. Broadwater said when she was a child and received the host, she thought of it as the Holy Ghost, He being the most portable person of the Trinity; now she thought of it as a symbol and implied that it was a pretty good one. I then said, in a very shaky voice, Well, if it's a symbol, to hell with it. That was all the defense I was capable of but I realize now that this is all I will ever be able to say about it, outside of a story, except that it is the center of existence for me; all the rest of life is expendable."

- Flannery O'Connor

8 June 2009

simple woman 8 June

new entry in my simple woman day book.... :D visit and get the template from Peggy at Simple woman Interested?... check it out...

FOR TODAY 8 June 2009...

Outside my window... sill no windows just glass walls into the concourse where there is a big FOSATU display, interesting history on unions in South Africa that...

I am thinking... car car car car car car car car car car car car car car car ... i think you get the gist

I am thankful for... God, love, the blessing i have in the here and now,

From the kitchen... would love to do a bit of cheese cake, my sweet cravings are waning again, thank the Lord, now for some serious health eating :D

I am wearing... my new super soft grey jersey and my new super smooth black strumpfhose with a black full skirt and my pretty black work shoes, my new Marian cross medallion ... i know dressed up today :D

I am creating... melodies in my heart ...

I am going... to SFC or a new cell soon I hope if we find one, stared the search yesterday

I am reading... The Shack by William P. Young, and loving it, especially given that yesterday was Trinity Sunday so a lot of it is very relevant in the now. and it is provocative and eyeopening and challenging... in other words just loving it!!! :D

I am hoping... still.... that the bank finances me already or tells me no, coz this waiting is torture... i need wheels! still!!!!!!!!!!

I am hearing... nothing at the moment, except a phantom of the operas mind worm... mmm let me look for the song....

Around the house... nothing much, baked for onyi on Saturday, planning on getting our washing machine today yippee and nya is beginning to think of the advantages of having a dishwasher... will have her converted yet ha ha!

One of my favourite things... new clothes... hate shopping but love new clothes that fit and look good;... like my new jersey :D

A few plans for the rest of the week... get a motor vehicle!

Here is picture thought I am sharing...
Still on the car! i know its getting old but i need one!

if i cant a have a mini then a yaris will have to do....

5 June 2009

trepidatious excitemnet

so i'm choosing books this week for book club! Yippee yippee ya ya!

Thing is, as excited as i am, i am a bit concerned as to what books to get... they will after all be mine in the end so it should be something i like, and should be something the book club has yet to read which already narrows down the field considerably and it has to be something that at least half of the book club would want to read methinks..... and my weekends are so busy, finding a quaint bookstore is nearly impossible without wheels, so i shall hunt online... now if only i had a credit card....

so some i may hunt for are:
It's Not about Me by Max Lucado

1 June 2009


so yesterday was Pentecost and it went well. i was totally blessed and managed to give my talk which was a blessing from the holy spirit because i would not have been able to do it without Him!. tash came and gave the second half of the talk, i talked about what spiritual gifts were in the catholic churches context and i had a blast! and then of course there was food after, always a highlight...

yesterday was also the first day for the full schola cantorum to sing as well and i say it wen well.. not super to the discerning ear but grand non the less... i love chant and what can i say the love of Latin is growing.. now to juggle scholar and catechism classes in between learning Veni Sancte Spritus...

so basically yesterday was another confirmation of what i've been trying to get a grip on for a while now... Discerning God's will for my life and my unique purpose... over time though i have begun to worry about it less and just letting go. I have been focusing more on trying to allow God to use me as He wills in my current situation...and i think i'm somewhat succeeding, my problem is i am one of those dramatic people who like stuff to be larger than life, so i want to be given a larger than life purpose too... but i'm leaving that more and focusing moe on living the ordinary in a holy way...

to discerning god's will though i believe i need a spiritual director and so i will proactively seek one :D and another thing tash said struck me to wake up everyday and say Come Holy Spirit fill my life today; an OK what's next God approach me thinks :D to let the Holy spirit fan to flam my gift, and to use it for the greater glory of God and the ministry of the church... and how scary that can be, and yet i'm not scared i'm just not there yet... so i'm thinking i need to be there before my purpose is revealed, yet how do i get there.... mmm hence the need of a spiritual director.. i have a someone in mind... whom i'm a bit apprehensive to approach... why is life so fraught with useless worries...

my recital

so have created my recital... and my talk for Pentecost tomorrow yay! recital is below... modge podge fro me and other various sources... most of the bottom part is not mine and borrowed from a poem i saw online...

The dreariness of the morn draws nigh,
The dragging of day that brings sighs;
the hopelessness of a hungry cry

The barrenness of the mind,
Near deafening silence
And the emptiness within becomes so loud
The loneliness that crushes the heart

The screams of the murdered
The howls of the oppressed
The cries, oh the cries!
That say evil has been here

There is no light,
Total darkness abounds,
In this total darkness,
We fumble about uselessly,

There be no peace here,
There be no joy,
There be sadness,
There just be bleakness.
And despair!!!!!
Deathly despair

A beam of light shines
Into that darkness,
And from this total darkness
The beam is a beacon calling out,

Arise from the grave and aspire
Arise from the grave and aspire
Arise and aspire

Pursue the beam as it shines out,
Onwards as far as it goes
Back to the Source from whence it comes

I, the Lord, am the Source of light,
From whom light shines forth

There Beams of hope God freely gives,
Little treasures in life He fills.
Reaching out to the oppressed
Shinning beams of tenderness.
Giving hope to all in need,
precious gifts from God above,
His perfect love

There’s a Cathedral in all around me,
And it’s under an open sky,
Where creation sings God’s praises
To whoever passes by.
The stars display His Glory
For every eye to see,

While the wind tells of His Love,
As it goes from tree to tree.
No choir could match the beauty
Of this Eternal song,
While all Heaven waits expectantly,
Knowing Jesus won’t be long.

A sunrise
A sunset
A smile
A hug
A kiss
A heartfelt laugh

The twinkling of a love in the twinkling of an eye
And in the beauty of that moment
You might glimpse the Fathers Heart,
As His compassion flows from Heaven,
As I reach out and do my part.

So, take me to the Father,
To His Throne above,
And let me sit upon His knee,
And know His tender Love.

I say take me to The Father,
To His Throne above,
And let me sit upon His knee,
Yes on daddy’s knee

In His perfect love

simple woman 1 June

new entry in my simple woman day book.... :D visit and get the template from Peggy at Simple woman Interested?... check it out...

FOR TODAY 1 June 2009...

Outside my window... people entering the concourse and rushing of to exams or offices... the joys of working on campus :D - out the building = freezing winter temps s guess who is office bound today :D

I am thinking... car car car car car car car car car car ---- i need one now! this taxi commuting business is just too stressful over my weekends!

I am thankful for... the Holy Spirit and that He came on Pentecost oh so long ago but decided to stick around for eternity :D

From the kitchen... nothing! still have to go grocery shopping, don't know when that will happen, what with the super busy weekend and NO CAR with which to do it after work :( boo hoo

I am wearing... not enough warm stuff, black pants, flats with two pairs of socks, striped orange and white top with a beige jersey

I am creating... melodies in my heart ... and Prolog for the first time...

I am going... nowhere slowly... and that's OK!

I am reading... Inkheart by Cornelia Funke - wish i had the German version too :D

I am hoping... that the bank finances me already or tells me no, coz this waitng is torture... i need wheels!

I am hearing... Various contemporary gospel stuff...

Around the house... dirty floor, no groceries, hence no packed lunch today, new TV card and a good Pride and Prejudice night last night... Oh Mr. Darcy!

One of my favourite things... Hot chocolate! warms me rght through!

A few plans for the rest of the week... get a motor vehicle!

Here is picture thought I am sharing...
Still on the car!

if i cant a have a mini then a yaris will have to do....
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